Urban Comfort

Taking a Sabbatical

On Friday morning, I sat down to write a post about strawberry buttercream. Then I realized I didn't want to write about strawberry buttercream. Not that there's anything wrong with it; it's wonderful, you should try it. But it's completely irrelevant to where my head is at these days.

As I mentioned before, I've been immersed in purging my life. I've been caught off guard by how intensely emotional and cathartic this process has been.  (I'm normally a moderate, not a zealot.) I'm not quite done, but by now I've handled just about every single possession I own, and it feels like I've handled not my belongings, but every chapter, every detail of my life, current and past.  It's ten years of therapy rolled into several months. It's been unexpected and very, very weird. It feels just like a breakup. You know, the impossible relationship that's clearly doomed but causes grief, nonetheless. 

Underneath this emotional roil, I have felt the stirrings of excitement and joy. There's work to be done; I'm anxious to get started. I've come full circle, arriving at the very beginning once again. Other than the discovery of an awesome lip pencil I'd forgotten about, my greatest (re)discovery in handling all the scraps of my life has been that the fundamental me hasn't gone anywhere.  It just needs to be reshaped.

But past the place of dreams lies the journey of many steps, the bits and pieces of hard work that have to be cobbled together into something solid. It requires attention, fewer distractions, the ability to get past my limitations, those walls erected by choice or circumstance. The only way through is focused learning. It seemed so impossible before, not enough time or resources to do and learn everything I wanted, but here, now, my brain has opened up.  I want less, but I want more. I'm ready to go deep.  

Which brings me to Urban Comfort. There are maybe a handful of people who care about my psychological or creative journey, and this blog doesn't feel like the right forum for that. This is not a new realization. I've written earlier drafts of this post going back more than a year. I kept feeling like I could revamp the old, but sometimes it's better to say goodbye to the old and start again. It's a painful decision to make, but Urban Comfort has become the stretched out, shapeless sweater still hanging in my closet. 

I suspect I'll be back to the Interwebs eventually, but more likely in a different format, one that more accurately reflects the pathways I want to take. But I need some time and distance to figure that out.

Thank you to everyone who's passed this way, who's made my life better and richer. Whether you were a commenter or a silent lurker, I appreciate that you shared in this space. I started Urban Comfort as a personal outlet, a way to connect with a community. I was lonely, as a new mother with a new life in post-Katrina New Orleans, a city that was struggling just as I was. My city is different now. Different than it was in my childhood, more bustling and booming than it was when I moved back. I'm different, too, stretched beyond my old skin. 

I will keep this site up, since a large number of readers come here through Pinterest. If you wish to be alerted when I have new plans, you can subscribe by email or through a reader, such as Feedly. In the meantime, I'll still be on Instagram and Pinterest, sharing in one way or another. 

I'll see you around! 

 

 

2 Great Recipes for a Weeknight

January always takes more from me than she gives. Even in New Orleans, better known for its subtropical heat. But January or not, there's always dinner to be made, and in the winter, I'm less likely to be happy with the simple, deconstructed meals I tend to favor in the summer. I want something to ward off the chill, to light a little fire inside. I want hearty and happy, but with my feet dragging across the floor, I need something simple and quick to prepare. 

Two of my favorite go-to dishes for a winter weeknight are spaghetti aglio e olio with roasted shrimp or a perfectly cooked ribeye served with mashed potatoes (or Ore-Ida Simply Olive Oil and Sea Salt Country Style Fries, if I'm feeling really lazy). I made both of these last week, back-to-back, on single parenting nights with plenty of homework. No blood or tears were shed in their creation, so I feel safe in saying they're good weeknight dishes. 

I use Ina Garten's recipe for spaghetti aglio e olio, with roasted shrimp (which is even easier than pan sautéing, if that's possible).  Before serving, I just toss the shrimp with the spaghetti. Even better, make extra and save the leftovers for lunch the next day. It's really good cold!

For the ribeye, I use Alton Brown's method, which has never once failed me. I reduce or increase the oven cooking time, depending on the thickness of the steak, but it's simple math. (Admittedly, I am precise with the cooking time, relying on the stopwatch feature on my phone. But when you're talking seconds rather than minutes, precision is key!) 

Simple, so good. Exactly what a chilly January night requires. 

 

Click thru for links

Ina Garten's Spaghetti Aglio E Olio

 

Directions for roasted shrimp:

1 pound large shrimp (26/30 count)
1 Tablespoon olive oil
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
1/2 teaspoon freshly ground pepper

Preheat oven to 400 °F. Toss shrimp with the olive oil, salt, and pepper. Spread them in one layer on a sheet pan and roast for 6-8 minutes, just until they're pink and cooked through.

 

Alton Brown's Pan-Seared Rib-Eye Recipe

 

 

Excuse Me While I Have an Identity Crisis

You know that feeling of being caught between lives, when you've outgrown one way of life but haven't comfortably shifted into another? That's been my life for awhile now. It's difficult, sometimes. I'm a person who sees possibilities, all of the many, varied roads that stretch ahead of me. But I'm also old enough to quickly curb some of those possibilities, to instinctively know what won't work for the long haul. That seesawing of possibility and pruning can be exhausting. But as I know from all the other times I've been caught between lives, there's no way out but through. 

This feeling of "messiness" in my life has probably contributed to my wanting less, as I mentioned in my last post. I feel nearly obsessed, lately, with stripping away the layers so I can determine what I want to keep or add on for the future. And truthfully, for me, all that psychological clarity has to begin in the physical world.

To that end, I've taken an entirely different approach to purging my workspace and home over the last couple of months. You might wonder how that's any different from the usual spring cleaning one does, but this feels more urgent to me, an absolute need to rid myself of whatever might be holding me back - anything that's taking up too much valuable space in my brain, takes too much effort to deal with on a daily basis, anything that doesn't enrich my life.

I've always given things away; purging my workspace is an ongoing necessity. But I no longer ask if something is too valuable or too good to toss, which implies a level of irresponsibility or wastefulness if I do let it go.  Now, I ask, simply, if I've outgrown it, implying growth and movement, generally a more positive perspective.  

Remarkably, that mindset has allowed me to jettison possessions almost without thinking. Think too much and I'll find a distant, far-flung reason for keeping it. Move with my instincts and the separation is so quick it's painless. Honestly, I barely even know what I've gotten rid of, but I'm feeling lighter and lighter. The good news is that once you get rolling, it gets easier and easier to say goodbye. 

My creativity is on hold during this time. I'm focusing every ounce of energy I have into paring down, streamlining, clearing the clutter of my inbox, my laptop, my office, my home, my life. There will be clarity when I reach the bottom, that's what keeps me going. It may not be true, but at the very least, there will be a lightness of being. And when I'm all stripped down to a comfortable leanness, I look forward to creating again, from the bottom up.

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Does this resonate with you?  If you need to lighten your load or move into another chapter of your life, you might find the following book helpful, The Life-changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing by Marie Kondo. 

Publishers send me lots of new books, most of which end up at my local thrift store immediately. But The Life-changing Magic of Tidying Up came just at the time I was beginning to purge my belongings, so I took the time to read it before handing it off to someone else.  While I ask myself whether I've outgrown something, Kondo asks you to question whether any particular item "sparks joy" for you.  If it doesn't, out it goes.  

At first glance, that seems simplistic. After all, there are plenty of tools in my house that don't "spark joy," but that I still find useful or necessary.  But I had a moment of realization, standing in my kitchen, admiring a container of hand carved wooden spoons in my baking area. They're out, exposed, but it brings me joy just to look at them. So I've resolved to take that approach even with utilitarian items.  If it's simple, beautiful, and well made, it will bring me joy.

My cake tester with the blue plastic top that didn't look good on display, but always got lost in a drawer when it was put away, replaced with this. Next on my list, this pan brush, vegetable brush, and bench scraper.  More expensive than what's readily available in local stores, but strangely calming. (I feel almost insane writing that, but somehow it's true.)

Other interesting tidbits - Instead of folding your clothes and storing them in stacks, Kondo shares a folding approach that allows your clothing to be stored vertically in a drawer (I tried this in my son's dresser and I can report that it's less messy in there since he can see exactly which shirts and pants he wants to wear, at a glance.) Another idea is to remove excess packaging and labels from bottles and toiletries, even those things stored in cupboards, more to reduce the visual chatter and calm the mind than anything else. 

There's more, but I'll let you read for yourself. And if you're not as obsessed as I am at the moment, or more comfortable with 1-minute tips to get you started, there's another book that just came out, Clear the Clutter, Find Happiness: One-Minute Tips for Decluttering and Refreshing Your Home and Your Life by Donna Smallin.

 

Wanting Less

 

I've made the mistake of perusing my blog list over the last couple of days; I'm already exhausted. So many resolutions and detoxes and ways to have more, be more, do more, more, more, more...and I suddenly realize exactly what I want for 2015.  I want less.  It feels strange to write that, anti-American almost, but as the old adage goes, less is more, sometimes. 

I could fill pages and pages with resolutions - things to quit, things to do, things to do better, new things to learn, ways and ways to fill up a day and a life. But this year, I have just one thing on my list.  Breathe, deeply. It's the one thing we forget to do when we're rushing headlong into life, scurrying here and there, juggling too many responsibilities, possibilities, and dreams at one time. But shallow breaths deplete us, one breath at a time.

If I breathe, deeply, I'll be more creative. I'll pause long enough to see the beauty that surrounds me. I'll take in the details that others miss. I'll have the chance to connect with the many projects born out of my fingertips over the course of a year.

If I breathe, deeply, I'll be healthier. My nervous system will be calmer, my head clearer, my chest more open, my muscles looser. 

If I breathe, deeply, I'll listen better, love better, be more patient and kind. 

Any one of those goals would be worthy on its own. All are available to me if I remember to breathe. Deeply.  

Happy New Year!  I hope you receive what you're most hoping for in this new year. 

xo

 

Special Delivery Christmas Tag

Remember when you were a kid and Christmas seemed to take forever to arrive? Sometimes I long for a return to that slow burn of anticipation. But here we are, with Christmas a little more than a week away! That means lots of gift wrapping this week.

I thought I'd share this simple gift tag with you to download. I printed mine on a shimmery cardstock (Stardream Quartz, available at Paper Source) and turned it into a hang tag, but you can print it on sticker paper and use it as a label on your mailed packages as well. 

(Download by clicking on the link below the image.)

Download Holiday Tag Printables

 

P.S.  The winner of the Smile Brilliant giveaway is Nikki N.  Congratulations!

 

 

 

Christmas Baking

I've been hard at work finishing assignments for next Christmas, dreaming of all the fun things I want to make and do for this Christmas. It feels like a late start this year, so I'm skipping most of the holiday crafting and overly ambitious decor in favor of the gift giving - the baking, the wrapping, the spreading of joy and cheer.  

First up, the baking. I've never been one of those people who bake a gazillion cookies every year, but I suddenly can't wait to get into the kitchen.  There will be booze, too.  Friends bring fruit from their trees, I make liqueurs. This year, there's been a steady stream of fruit, which means my kitchen is populated with bottles and bottles of satsuma, calamondin, and kumquat liqueurs along with the blackberry whiskey and almond liqueur I've been aging since last year.  Lots of holiday cheer. But I digress. Back to that holiday baking.

I'm gathering up all the recipes I plan to make for friends and family and it seemed selfish not to share them.  I really want to stretch a bit, try something new.  Of course there will be some favorites that I'll revisit, such as the Scandinavian Almond Cake and Rosemary Butter Cookies from this post.  They'll be part of my holiday repertoire forever and ever! Amen. 

Here's what else I'm eyeing this year - 

 

Coconut Pecan Pralines from Confession of a Cookbook Queen.  Over the summer, a friend mentioned his mother's coconut pralines, which was an entirely new concept to me, and one I've been eager to try. The addition of pecans is a bonus.

 

Because there can never be too many pecans,  I'll be making this Pecan Fig Nougat from For the Love of the South as well.

 

I spend most of my year waiting for blackberry season to roll around again. It's all too short of a season, so blackberry jam keeps me happy during the waiting. Blackberry Jam Shortbread Bars from Recipe Girl.

As a Southerner, red velvet is simply part of my cultural heritage. Besides, these Red Velvet Crinkle Cookies from Cooking Classy are too pretty to pass up.

Lemon Almond Cookie Wreaths from Cook Republic.   Because sometimes you just need a simple cookie to eat by the fistful.

I made these Calissons once (from this recipe by Foodbeam) and they were lovely. Except it was summer and I thought they'd be nice for the winter months instead. I use my absolute favorite orange blossom water from Mymoune, which there seems to be a current shortage of.  However, I was able to locate it through The Meadow (available for pick-up or mail order).

 

 
Let's face it, the holidays require copious amounts of coffee. What better accompaniment than Eggnog Biscotti from Home Cooking Memories?  

 

Admittedly, I find these Mushroom Shaped Lebkuchen from Twigg Studios completely adorable, but we all need a little gingerbread during the holidays. 

 

That's where I'm at so far. When all is said and done, I think I'll need some type of chocolate concoction beyond the red velvet. I could always make fudge, but that's hardly stretching myself. Or I could try the Brutti Ma Buoni from my friend, Chef Lisa White.  They're my son's absolute favorite cookie in the entire world and she brings him full boxes which he always manages to eat singlehandedly.  Perhaps it's time to give them a whirl at home. 

Does anyone else have any favorites I should try?  Post a link in the comments (or include the recipe) or email me. 

Happy Monday!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Giveaway from Smile Brilliant

It's December, my favorite holiday season of all!  And In this season of giving, I thought it only appropriate to start the month with a giveaway, made possible through the generosity of Smile Brilliant. 

When Smile Brilliant approached me and asked if I wanted to try out their custom-fitted teeth whitening trays and gels, it was a no-brainer.  I'd had great results with the single professional whitening I'd tried in the past, before my wedding, but it was pricey (to the tune of $600+)!  Since then I've relied on whitening toothpastes and the occasional whitening strips, but there's nothing better than having a tray that fits your teeth perfectly and allows the gel to penetrate fully and evenly.

That's where Smile Brilliant comes in. They've taken the middleman out of the experience, an economical approach that allows you the convenience of customized service right from your own home, without the hefty price tag. It's easy - the Tray Creation Kit contains impression material for you to make your own dental impressions along with postage paid envelopes for you to mail your impressions back to the lab. In 2-5 days, your custom trays are created and shipped back to you. Just like that. 

It might sound complicated to make dental impressions, but don't let your fears get the best of you. The company includes detailed directions and the process was really quite simple. Make a mistake?  No worries. You have an extra pack of impression material should you need it. Turnaround was really quick and the resulting trays fit like a glove. Then it was on to the fun part, the whitening!

I've had problems with tooth sensitivity in the past, so I used the Desensitizing Gel before the Whitening Gel. I didn't have any issues with sensitivity and found it quite easy to keep the trays in for an hour at a time. You can keep them in for up to 3 hours, but I found an hour to be a more practical chunk of time (since it's nearly impossible for me to go more than an hour without talking). And after a week of use, I can definitely see the difference!   

But what I really love about this service is that it's not a one-time deal.  My trays can be stored in their case, ready for the next time I want to whiten.  I can also order refills of the whitening gel when I need it. It's a great deal, bringing professional whitening back into the realm of possibility for the average consumer. Because honestly, your smile is out there all the time (at least I hope it is). Why not give it a little TLC?

 

GIVEAWAY DETAILS:

So here's where you come in - Smile Brilliant will send a Tray Creation Kit (complete with Desensitizing and Whitening Gel) to one lucky reader. 

Click through the Rafflecopter link below to enter.  The giveaway is open for 2 weeks, after which the winner will be posted here and notified by email. Good luck!

A Rafflecopter Giveaway from Smile Brilliant

 Don't forget to check out Smile Brilliant on their website for detailed information on their products.

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I received a complimentary Tray Creation Kit from Smile Brilliant. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

 

Satsuma Meyer Lemon Icebox Pie

Most Thanksgivings you'll find me in the kitchen making the traditional array of pies. But on Wednesday, when my cousin left a bag of beautiful satsumas and Meyer Lemons on my porch, I did a spontaneous turnabout and concocted a creamy icebox pie. Sweet with just enough acid to cut through the heaviness of endless Thanksgiving sides. 

Satsumas are plentiful in Louisiana at this time of year, but you can substitute tangerines or clementines if they're not readily available to you. Just be sure to make this pie the day before you need it, as it requires chilling time before serving. 

And now, let the Christmas festivities begin!

SATSUMA & MEYER LEMON ICEBOX PIE

2 1/2 cups graham cracker crumbs
1/2 + 1/8 cup sugar
10 Tbsp. unsalted butter, melted

1 1/2 cups freshly squeezed satsuma juice (tangerine, clementine or mandarin orange juice may be substituted)
1/2 cup freshly squeezed Meyer lemon juice
Zest of 1 orange
Zest of 1/2 lemon
Two 14-oz. cans sweetened condensed milk
2 large egg yolks

Heat oven to 400 degrees F.  Combine graham cracker crumbs and sugar in a bowl and stir in melted butter with a fork until evenly combined. Transfer to a 9-inch Springform pan and press into the bottom and halfway up the sides; set aside. 

Combine juice, orange and lemon zest, condensed milk, and yolks in a bowl; beat on medium-high speed of a hand mixer for 5 minutes. 

Pour into prepared crust and place Springform pan on a baking sheet.  Bake until crust is browned and filling is only slightly set, about 20-25 minutes. 

Let pie cool, then freeze until set, at least 2 hours or overnight.  Transfer to the refrigerator - remove 15 minutes before serving.  Serve with whipped cream on the side. 

 

What's your personality type?

My childhood best friend's father died recently, unexpectedly.  I was caught off guard when I heard, the way you are when someone seems too young to have died or you're suddenly aware of the passage of time. It had been many years since I'd last seen him, at the funeral of his daughter, where I was rendered mute with grief. It had been a number of years since I'd seen him before that as well. 

But I should have told him what a simple and profound gift he'd given me back when I was just a teenager, fighting to figure out who I was and what place I held in the world. It was the time of giant, boxy computers, when technology wasn't yet part of the consumer's world. I couldn't Google questions and get a plethora of answers, those I had to muddle through on my own.

I suspect when he offered to administer the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator test to my friend and I, that he was trying to make sense of us, what was intrinsic to us and what was sheerly teenage madness. It was one of the tools he used to place candidates in the right positions at Exxon.  Surely he'd had success with seeing how personality typing fit into the workplace, why not use that magic power to understand two impetuous, semi-hostile, risk-taking teenagers.  Why not?

We each plowed through the computerized test. There were no obviously right or wrong answers, just preferences. If you took it instinctively, going with your gut instead of pondering the answers, supposedly you would gain insight into how you viewed the world, which generally informed how you behaved in the world - the people, the experiences, the careers you'd be drawn to, the risks you were or weren't likely to take.

My friend was an ENFP.  Straight up, no ambiguity, and heavy on the feeling side. Sounded right.  Then it was my turn, and my friend's father looked excited as he headed toward me, a sheaf of papers in hand.  I was an ENXP - a rarity, he said. I'd scored almost exactly the same in the Feeling and Thinking categories (with an extra point, I think, in the direction of feeling). It was a bridge, a natural checks and balances that would allow me to see both sides of an issue, to empathize with two different viewpoints, and more importantly, to find balance within myself.

It may sound a bit simplistic, but knowing my personality type gave me the confidence I needed to trust myself, to know that I wouldn't veer too far off in the wrong direction. But it also gave me the insight to understand how those around me view the world, how to bridge the gap between our perspectives instead of stubbornly insisting on my own viewpoint. Magic, hoodoo, who cares? It's worked for me, and I'll take all the tools I can get in this life. 

I use it to relate to my husband, who is almost exactly the opposite of me. I use it when considering how to raise my son, integrating his view of the world and how he relates to it, trying to offer him the perspective that will seem most natural to him. And I've used it in my career, knowing that certain opportunities wouldn't be good choices for my long term, despite the pretty packaging (also known as simply trusting your gut). 

At any rate, I share this personal story because I think that personality typing is a great tool, at any age. I Googled Myers-Briggs a few days ago and it's much easier to take now than it used to be (yay, technology). It's about $50 to take the original test, though you will get detailed analysis when you go that route. I did find a couple of other sites that offer similar versions of personality tests.  I took both and actually got just about the same score, with a very slight preference for Feeling over Thinking, which almost aligns with my original results (and underscores the fact that personalities don't change much). I've linked to those sites below, along with a few other resources.  

I hope you'll see for yourself, because honestly, a little insight can go a really long way.  Thank you, Larry, even though I never told you.

 

Click through links:

Background on Myers-Briggs Type Indicator from Wikipedia

The Myers & Briggs Foundation

Take the Myers-Briggs test

Take a free, mini test at 16 Personalities (offers a sliding scale for answers, which may be preferable for many people).

Take a free Jung Typology Test at Human Metrics

25 Struggles Only ENFPs will Understand from Thought Catalog  (Additional lists for other types are available here as well)

Nurture by Nature: Understand Your Child's Personality Type - And Become a Better Parent  by Paul D. Tieger and Barbara Barron-Tieger

 

It's been a great tool in my life and subsequent testing has been consistent, but not everyone agrees --

A contrary viewpoint, to round things out, from Vox 

Does It Pay to Know Your Type? from The Washington Post

 

 

 

Before the Harvest

A freelancer's life is often feast or famine and these last couple of months have been a blur of overlapping deadlines and assignments, leaving me on the unbalanced side of life. Still, I am grateful, a squirrel gathering the bounty before the bleakness of winter sets in. 

I ended the week with a Halloween photo shoot for next year, and as I packed up the last of our set on location, I rushed out the door to go trick or treating only to return home and pack up for yet another photo shoot, one of a personal nature that I'd waited a year to bring to fruition, relying on the cycle of nature, its maturation, then harvest. 

Sunday morning I awoke to a brilliant sunrise in sugarcane country, the smoke from the raw sugar mill billowing out over the horizon. The air smelled of fire and cane syrup, the road humming and electric as the big trucks moved back and forth, carrying loads of cut sugarcane. It was exhilarating, a new experience for me, but somehow deeply embedded in my DNA. 

My family tree and relationships are complicated and I grew up knowing very little of my father's history until later in life. But when an elderly gentleman in a small cafe in Cajun country asked me if I was a Louisiana Stirling, one of the sugar people, I had a shock of recognition. I may not have known the details, but I have been fascinated with sugar and cane since I was a child. 

Looking back through photos of road trips, there are recurring themes of cane fields, the tall stalks blowing in the wind beneath hovering storm clouds, an endless sea of green. I can see the color, even when I photographed them in black and white. I remember, too, as a child begging my stepfather to stop by the side of the road to cut the cane for me. I loved to chew on the thick stalks, extracting the juice. Later, I moved on to a love of rum. I enjoy the taste, but more than that, I love the smell. 

There is nothing romantic about the growing and harvesting of cane. It is difficult, back-breaking work that I know nothing of, other than what I've read about.  But standing on the edge of a cane field, peering into that sea of green, the air swelling with humidity, it's one of the most peaceful things I know. It's the other side of my conflict between city and country, the New Orleans that was my mother's family, the country that was my father's. It exists in me, that blurring, that longing for the other, the strands of DNA running in opposite directions. I will never fully satisfy that itch, but I've come to love the ache of the unresolved.  

 

Spiderweb Lace Printing

How is it possible that it's Thursday already?! It's been a sprint this week, juggling multiple editors, magazines, and holidays. But it's been one of those awesome weeks, with all synapses firing and feeling like I'm in the zone. Getting in the zone, sometimes that's more than half the battle. 

But I thought I'd drop in here and share a quick tutorial from one of the features I mentioned in my last post. This is such a simple craft and it's no different than spray painting through regular lace. But rather than a tidy, ladylike effect, I went for a more organic, spooky feel that's better suited to Halloween.

Although I'm showing this on dinnerware (not food safe!), you can use this process for just about anything you can spray paint.  Try it on paper, bags, boxes, fabric or canvas, bottoms of serving trays (think cocktails), mirrors, even your pumpkin. No special skills required!

Materials:

Novelty spiderweb lace (See Resources below)
Fabric scissors
Repositionable adhesive
Flat, black spray paint or black spray primer
Scrap paper 

My lace looked like the lace at the top left of the photo. I liked the web design, but I wasn't so fond of the spiders. So the first thing I did was cut out all of the spiders, leaving me with the bits of cobweb lace shown at the top right.

Once I had a pile of lace pieces, I sprayed them all with repositionable adhesive (I prefer Elmer's brand) and let them dry for a few minutes. After that, I arranged them on my surface, pressing them into place.  In my design, I left some spaces open, overlapped other pieces elsewhere.  The point here is to get an organic arrangement, so don't overthink it.

After the arrangement is in place, it's time to spray paint. I actually don't use spray paint at all for this - I prefer to use black spray primer.  It's very flat, dries super fast, and since it's a primer, I know it's meant to stick. But if you can't find black primer, use a regular matte finish paint or black floral spray. 

I like to hold my paint can a couple of feet above my design and spray in short bursts, so I get more of a misting effect.  That way, I can add more paint if needed.  I also keep my arm fairly stationary, instead of spraying back and forth. What I'm looking for are some concentrated areas of color and some that fade off a bit. 

Once I'm finished painting, I let it dry for about 5 minutes, then remove the lace.  (I can usually reuse the lace 2-3 more times, depending on how heavy the paint buildup is.)  And that's it. I haven't sealed mine or taken any extra measures and none of the primer has flaked off, even after being stacked.

 

Resources:

Novelty Spiderweb Lace - I usually find this by yard at Jo-Ann, but you can find other lace versions at places like Party City, usually sold as tablecloths or runners

Repositionable Adhesive - I find Elmer's brand to be the easiest and most reliable to work with. It's often a little less expensive as well. It can be found at most craft stores.

Title image by Brie Williams

 

 

 

 

Doom & Gloom for Halloween

I know, it seems a little early to be posting Halloween stuff. (But honestly, who can tell anymore? If you go to craft stores, the Christmas merchandise is already out.) So we'll ease into it. I thought I'd start with Halloween lite, projects that aren't blatantly Halloween in feel - though guests may ask if you're struggling with depression if you display them at other times of the year.

These are a few of the projects in this year's edition of Halloween Tricks & Treats by Better Homes and Gardens. It's on newsstands now, of course, and also available online at Zinio.  

 

 

 

 

All photos by Brie Williams | Graphics available at BHG

Remembering

Time is a funny thing, it plays tricks on your mind sometimes. Thirteen years ago I was waking up on this morning, having just moved to New York a week before, a mixture of hope and nervous excitement that quickly merged into horror and helplessness, watching the world collapse from afar. And yet, it seems like such a very short time ago, certainly not the thirteen years that my calendar tells me has passed. 

There's very little that I want to say about that day publicly, but in remembering my heart catches in my throat even now. It's a day that belongs to all of us, not just New Yorkers, because it was a day that changed a world, not just a city.

Remembering.

Vietnamese Iced Coffee

Okay, who am I kidding with all of this fall talk? It's still hot outside. ( I tried to fool myself the other day with a long sleeved T-shirt and nearly passed out from heat exhaustion.) So I'll have to satisfy myself psychologically with seasonal projects while accepting reality, namely, the need for iced coffee.

I'm addicted to caffeine. No sugarcoating it. But like most things that become a need rather than a pleasure, I found over time that it just wasn't as much fun as it used to be. I powered through cups of coffee every day in an effort to stay minimally awake. However, as my energy levels are becoming more balanced, I find that I don't need nearly as much coffee to get through my day. It's a relief, it's allowed me to experience the pleasure of ritual again. 

On a sweltering summer afternoon this year, I had the bliss of an afternoon with my friend Natalie and my first experience with iced Vietnamese coffee at The Orange Couch. It was so luxurious, it was almost like having dessert. An occasion to indulge in pleasure rather than simple, greedy refueling. 

It's a DIY affair at The Orange Couch, so I experienced the slow dripping of chicory coffee into a mug already containing condensed milk. Afterwards, a stir to bring it all together, and a pour over ice. No need for additional sweeteners or dairy. It's thick and rich, not the watered down mixture that often passes for iced coffee. I was instantly hooked. 

It's easy to make Vietnamese coffee at home. You can order an inexpensive phin and coffee online, even the sweetened condensed milk, if you desire. Of course, convenience has its place, too, and I'm elated by the bottled version I can buy from Magasin, one of my favorite local Vietnamese restaurants.  Their bottled coffee isn't available for mail order yet, but Caphin out of Houston, TX is now selling their bottled brew online. Buy a case and stash it away for those occasions when the usual cup of joe just won't do.

 

Here's how to make it at home --

Iced Vietnamese Coffee

2 Tablespoons dark roast ground coffee (see Resources)
2 Tablespoons sweetened condensed milk

Bring 1 cup of water to a boil. Remove the top screen from the filter, add coffee, then screw the top screen on. Place the filter over a 12-oz. heatproof container or glass that contains the condensed milk.

Pour a splash of hot water into the filter, to allow the coffee grounds to bloom. As the coffee begins to drip through, add enough water to reach the top of the filter. Place the lid back on the filter and let the coffee drip through, about 4 minutes.  (If the coffee stops dripping before 4 minutes has passed, you may need to gently loosen the screw to relieve the pressure.)

Stir to combine, then pour over ice.

Resources:

Something you may not know about New Orleans - We have a large, vibrant Vietnamese population, so Vietnamese food is as much a part of our current cuisine as the usual fare that's synonymous with New Orleans culture.

Want to get into details? Coffee Geek has a detailed analysis (and tutorial) for making the best Vietnamese coffee possible. 

Coffee:  Our own Cafe du Monde coffee and chicory is often used, but you can purchase the tradtional Trung Nguyen Gourmet Blend  online. 

Phins (coffee filter sets) are available at many Asian stores, also through Amazon.  I've linked to the single serving size here, but they do come in different sizes. 

I use Eagle Brand condensed milk since it's the most readily available, but you can buy Longevity brand online.

 

Hanx Writer App

I learned to type at the age of 14, and yes, I learned to type on an actual typewriter, the IBM Selectric. I kind of loved it, the clicking and carriage return. There was something soothing about it and electrifying at the same time.  Just how fast could I go?  

I had no problem switching over to a computer keyboard. Let's face it, that was magic of a different sort. But the typewriter still lingers as a form of romance. The clicking of a computer keyboard will never match the satisfying sound of typewriter keys striking an impression into paper. Until now, anyway.

Enter Tom Hanks (the actor), who's been collecting typewriters over the last thirty years. Working with a developer, he's created an app for the iPad that combines the ease and speed of your tablet with the sound and pacing of a manual typewriter. You can retain that original typewriter speed for deleting, by using the DELETE key for erasing, one character at a time. Or you can turn it off and use a modern delete speed. 

I have to say, it's really fun!  It's also free, with additional purchase options through the app. Even better, you can save your typed documents as they appear on your screen, print them out, and email them. I'm in love! Now, off to write the great American novel...

 

Off the Boards: Grapefruit Bars

My oven sat idle for far too long this summer and I suddenly felt the urge to bake something yesterday, but it had to be quick and simple.  This recipe is both of those, born out of a Pinterest pin from Jennifer at Savory Simple. I wish I could take credit for this idea, but I cannot (though I have to wonder why I never thought of it, as much as I love grapefruit and as long as I've made lemon bars). However, the original pin went back and forth between recipes and I was a little lazy, so I just made adjustments to my standard lemon bar recipe.

I like the grapefruit! It's completely different than a lemon bar, not a wishy washy, could be any kind of citrus bar. Distinctively grapefruit. It's a little tart, not achingly sweet, a good variation of a classic to take you into the fall and winter months. 

 
Grapefruit Bars

Crust:

1 cup all-purpose flour
1/4 cup confectioners sugar
pinch salt
1/2 cup unsalted butter, cold, cut into cubes

Filling:

2 large eggs
3/4 cup granulated sugar
3 tablespoons freshly squeezed pink grapefruit juice
1/4 teaspoon baking powder
2 tablespoons flour
2 teaspoons finely shredded grapefruit zest

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. In a medium bowl, stir together flour, powdered sugar, and salt. Using a pastry blender, cut in butter until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Press mixture into the bottom of an ungreased 8-inch square baking pan. Bake 15-20 minutes or until the top is just golden.

While the crust is baking, prepare the filling: 

Combine all filling ingredients (except the zest) in a bowl. Beat at low speed, scraping bowl when needed, until well mixed.  Stir in grapefruit zest.  Pour filling over hot, partially baked crust. Continue baking for 18-20 minutes, or until the edges turn golden and the center is set. Cool completely on a wire rack.  Dust with powdered sugar and cut into bars. 

Tip: Before making the crust, I line my baking pan with aluminum foil (the ends forming an overhang over the edges of the pan), then just lift the whole thing out of the pan after it's baked. I find it easier to cut into bars that way.

 

Stepping into Fall

I am done with summer. It's not the heat or humidity, it's psychological. I'm ready to turn the page, step into a new season. Professionally, it's been fall and winter for the last couple of months already. I've worked on Thanksgiving, thought of 30 different ways to wrap Christmas gifts, and crafted my share of holiday projects. I've just been waiting for everyone else to catch up.

Personally, I'm feeling better and better.  It's a slow process, with ongoing adjustments, but I'm getting somewhere nonetheless. I'm grateful, careful of not squandering what I have, suddenly aware of how little I was working with. I'm also thankful for finding a doctor who listens to me rather than just looking at lab numbers. I wouldn't be in this space without him (and to the many women who wrote to me privately, filling me in on their own medical dilemmas, I would encourage you to advocate for yourselves and keep looking until you find a doctor who hears you and isn't afraid to think outside the box. Don't give up - it's important!). 

Creatively, I'm still in a bit of a mishmash. It's such a busy season for me professionally that I find I'd rather clean my house or move my furniture around in my downtime than pick up another creative project. But soon I'll start sharing some seasonal ideas. My brain is already in overdrive, thinking of things I want to create. 

Happy (almost) fall!

P.S. The butterflies pictured above are an easy DIY. I used store bought Monarch butterflies (found at Michaels) and sprayed them with a misting of metallic spray paint.  If you hold your paint can at least a foot above the butterflies, you can give them a fine coating that doesn't obscure the pattern underneath. Copper, bronze, and gold are all a natural fit for the season. You can also mix the metallics, spraying one color on the body of the wings, then misting the tips with a different color. They're pretty and catch the light nicely. 

 

Back to Reading

As a child, much of my world revolved around reading. I moved through books at a clip, never enough hours in the day. But over the last few years there's been very little reading. In my undiagnosed state, I attributed my sieve like brain and inability to concentrate to an overbooked life, not a thyroid condition. I traded reading for television, entertaining, but not always the most satisfying.

At any rate, as I'm getting back on track and find that my brain is working again, I've managed to read a book in 3 days, rediscovering how much I love to read. I picked an especially good book to start with, Elizabeth Strout's Olive Kitteridge, which has been on my nightstand forever. 

I knew just a few pages in that I was on to something good. There are just stories and styles of writing that fill me with a little ache while I'm reading, a sense of longing that I can't quite articulate. That feeling almost gives me goose bumps, an awareness of being in the presence of quiet greatness. That's what I felt during the entire length of this book. 

Unlike a typical novel, Olive Kitteridge is a collection of 13 interconnected stories that shed light on small town life and its inhabitants, their tragedies, disappointments and failures, their expectations and quiet joys. I've read reviews that declared it "depressing," but I am of an age where I don't require the feel good endings. Yes, I appreciate happiness, but I also appreciate the complexities, the hard fought, honest and mature perspective of human beings who've fully engaged in life. It's a wonderful, thoughtful read. I highly recommend it.

As for myself, it's great to be back in action! I'm so excited I can't even decide what to read next.  Too many books, never enough time. There are worse dilemmas to have. 

 

P.S. HBO has turned this book into a four-part miniseries starring Frances McDormand as Olive Kitteridge. It's set to air in November.

See How My Garden Grows

We're in the height of summer now. I can tell because it gets more and more difficult to fully close doors, our home swelling with the humidity as I imagine it has done for the last 150 years. I saw the sunrise this morning, in my quest to restore my body and mind to some semblance of its better, prior state. The idea that I would see the sunrise for such a purpose seems laughable, belonging to an entirely more responsible individual. In my heart, I am a night owl and I struggle daily to fight against my primal nature. Generally, I succeed and I return to the start of my day, sweaty and flushed with victory, even if it means I will be a bit weary later on.

There's both movement and stillness to my summer, but not as much fun as I had planned. This focus on health feels so boring and yet, I know I will reap the benefits later on. It seems so simple in the beginning, pop a pill, move on with your life. But then it's weeks of getting the right dosage, teasing apart the symptoms that belong to something else. Then I'm waiting for test results, waiting to find out if I have thyroid cancer. I don't, but it's a strange, suspended state, that waiting. I've been here before. I'm always lucky. I feel relieved, then immediately guilty for all those who aren't, who weren't. I move on, one foot in front of the other. 

I don't cook much at the moment. I keep it simple. I've even learned to skim the most pleasurable of experiences, dipping just a toe into that pleasure instead of diving in. That part is not as hard as I'd thought. But I've had to shut off that creative part of my brain, the part that thinks about pairings of flavors and trying something new.  I will be able to return to that one day. But for now, I let it recede. 

I continue to make paper flowers. It is the most soothing thing I do. When it's been a few days without a new creation, I begin to feel a little anxious, wound up. I sit in quiet, I make, and balance is restored. My garden is growing. One day I will train it, allow the creations to take forms, but I don't need it yet. The tangled growth is fine. Let it be. 

On occasion I wander at night, my camera in hand. I am a voyeur, always after that glimpse of life through windows and in doorways. I love the shadows, the unexpected hits of light, the empty places after the fun dies down. Those moments, they are a gift to my primal nature. Then I go home, wake with the sun, and move on, one foot in front of the other.  Soon, it will be fall.

 

In Pursuit of Beauty (Part IV)

It's my birthday today, which is pretty much the only day I address beauty issues here (you can see previous years here, here, and here), but this year is a bit different for me -

Last month I took my son out to dinner. As the waitress brought our check, she said that my skin looked amazing and asked what I used. I gave her a brief rundown (Retin-A and a new CC cream) and encouraged her to try it out for herself. As she left, my son looked at me from across the table and said, "Your skin may look amazing because of that stuff you're putting on it, but you're still going to die one day."  (He can't help himself - He lives in New Orleans, surrounded by cemeteries.) After making a mental note to work on his conversational skills before he's old enough to date, I made a decision to finally see my doctor for a much overdue checkup.

I hate going to the doctor. I don't know why I hate it so much, but I do. Because I don't get sick that often, I find it's easy to let checkups slip by. But I knew that I needed help, had known it for at least a year. There was the sudden onset of anxiety, the lack of mental acuity and the inability to focus, the general exhaustion and fatigue, the irritability, the constant feeling of being overwhelmed, a creeping sense of depression, the needle on the scale that didn't move backwards no matter how little I ate, the pain I was starting to feel in my bones and joints...I thought that I was experiencing perimenopausal symptoms, something a girlfriend's doctor had said could start as early as your mid-thirties. That thought was depressing, too. My skin might be in good shape, but it didn't feel like anything else was. 

I finally went, and after a battery of tests I got an early birthday present - a prescription of Synthroid and Vitamin D. A low thyroid and a Vitamin D deficiency (clearly I've been too good about using sunscreen) could be responsible for my entire litany of complaints. The rest of me was just fine, with menopause out in the distant future. 

It will take a little while for me to start feeling better, but I feel hopeful, something I haven't felt in awhile. I've also started taking my health more seriously, partnering with a friend for regular exercise and taking advantage of the umpteen green smoothie recipes on the web to get more fruits and vegetables into my diet. Because really, what good is younger looking skin if you feel like crap?

 

PRODUCT NOTES FOR THE YEAR:

SKIN:  Overall, I find I'm using less makeup than ever before and I've stopped using foundation altogether, a big money saver.  

I've been an ardent fan of Smashbox BB Cream (in the new shade, Light/Neutral, which is perfect for me).  But it was sold out when I needed it and the saleswoman suggested It Cosmetics' CC+ Cream, a full coverage CC Cream that I can wear without moisturizer underneath (impossible for me with the BB Cream). I apply it with a damp BeautyBlender sponge for sheer coverage, but it's buildable to almost a full coverage foundation. With a light hand, I think it's absolutely gorgeous on skin.  To set it, I use a dusting of Smashbox Halo Powder. 

BROWS:  Thinning brows are definitely an issue, but I'd rather have thinning brows than see any sort of pencil line. I think the Smartbrow set is absolutely worth the money if the color match is good. I found the Brunette to be slightly too light for my natural brow color and Brown/Black to be slightly too dark. But the effect of it is really nice and natural looking. A better color fit for me (and less expensive) is Gimme Brow from Benefit Cosmetics.